The other night I had a dream filled with images of my laptop, my Chrome browser, and me hectically scrolling through a never ending website with a flashing red screen that I had somehow ruined. Talk about a stress dream!
When you’re in a position of leadership, it’s important to remember to take care of yourself. Not just your body, but your heart. If we’re not careful, we can become all consumed in our work and anxieties. Leading to burnout, overwhelm, and major stress dreams!
We have a membership platform called The Yellow Collective (hop on our email list here to read more). There are various chapters for The Yellow Collective all over the country, each with wonderful, giving leaders who run those chapters. Being that these leaders are constantly serving, we always want to offer them a chance to be served. So, each quarter we host an event or a retreat specifically for our chapter leaders.
Last quarter we worked with Tribe of Asher and hosted an interactive dinner gathering for our leaders. Our theme was “Heart”, so each course, exercise, and talking point was centered around caring and tending to the heart. Check out our recap video below!
We were served three courses for dinner by Chef Christian Navarro of HellaFraiche (talk about spoiling us). Each course was paired with an interactive conversational topic lead by Executive Coach, Amanda Inchaustegui from Novus Global. Everything was dripping with meaning. Each dish corresponded with the topic of conversation, and vise versa.
As we sat around the table, we were introduced to the first course, “The Belly”. _Amanda lead us through a journaling exercise where we asked ourselves what our “shoulds” are in life. “_I believe I should… fill in the blank”. We were challenged to ask ourselves what the inner conversation happening in both our hearts and heads looked like.
Asking ourselves this question lead us to wonder, “What am I choosing to believe is true that is leading me to feel that way?” And further, “What am I getting from holding tight to these beliefs, and what is the cost?” We all got clear on our current reality, being honest about what we gain from it, and looking at what the cost is to us, others, and our dreams/visions/goals. We complain about so much, but the complaint is a racket in front of the beliefs we are really holding onto of what we are making “right” in our lives.
The second course was “The Mind”. Amanda used this time to share her story with us, and how she has used the exercise of “anchors” as a new way of being.
“I was going hard and fast, convincing myself and everyone around me that I was Wonder Woman, able to do it all. I found pride in things being “hard” or me being so worn out. It was a badge of honor that proved my worth. Achieving was everything. Then, I had over a dozen miscarriages. I didn’t know how to pause and connect with what I was feeling. And to see what I was believing to be true about myself and the world around me. The cost was my health and being a part of creating a vulnerable marriage. After discovering my husband’s infidelity, I got clear that I was not going to pay that cost anymore. So I slowed down to notice the thoughts I was believing and making true in my life. I learned to pause. To be present. To notice. And own my power to choose the life I was creating. I intentionally shifted and began to create the life that, up until then, I had only dreamt of, radically transforming my life, marriage, family and career.”
Powerful stuff, right? Amanda asked us to think about what we WANT to be feeling, and what we need to believe in order to feel that way. The idea here is that we can actually shift our state by shifting our beliefs. Our actions will flow from our way of being, and will transform every area of our life. What is the state we want to be in? What new beliefs need to be true to create that state in our lives? What would we gain if we committed to these new beliefs? What would be the cost? Is it worth it?
As we replace the old with the new, these beliefs become our new declarations.
We regain our power through our posture as we begin to notice, be aware, and intentionally shift ourselves- and the “new” begins to unfold! Some examples of these anchors are: I am worth it. I am a quick learner. I am wise. I am curious. I am free. I am authentic. I am strong. We chatted through these ideas with the women sitting at the table, writing down our own affirmations and anchors that we could turn to when we needed encouragement.
We all got to finish the night chatting and relaxing while eating bites of some amazing chocolate, from chocolatier, Romeo, paired with a cup of sipping chocolate. It was SO GOOD. Our stomachs and hearts left full with amazing food and good, intentional conversation.
If you’re a leader, you too can ask yourselves these questions. Pausing to connect with how you’re feeling, and being intentional about the conversation happening in your head is key to healthy leadership. Fill in these blanks.
- I BELIEVE I SHOULD…
- THIS BELIEF IS COSTING ME…
- I CHOOSE TO BELIEVE THAT I AM…
Take time to ask yourself those questions today. Change the conversation happening in your head and heart.
If you are interested in starting a Yellow Collective chapter in your area and becoming a leader, head here to fill out an application.
We are currently on the hunt for women in Denver, Chicago, and San Francisco area, and would love to have you join us!
Special thanks to our partners for this dinner: